Week 10: The Positive Mindset

. Bill Phillips talks about the power of a positive mindset. I know for myself I occasionally (sometimes often) have negative thoughts. I know how unhealthy it is for my mind and my body. I like how Bill not only talks about it's powerful effect but also gives us 4 techniques to help bring about a postivie mindset. So here it is:

Bill Phillips says, "Unlike the physical body, the mind is very fluid and it can take on a new form in an instant. We can be confident, believing in our ability one moment, doubtful and uncertain the next. This can be especially true when taking on something new and challenging like this transformation process. In order for us to successfully reach our goals with this work, we must know how to set and reset the mind in a positive direction . Here are 4 tried-and-true techniques to transform your mindset in minutes:
1) TAKE ACTION
The longer we procrastinate and avoid taking action, the tighter the grip of fearful and apprehensive thoughts becomes. There's a surefire way to put an end to that. It's to get up, get moving, and as Nike says, just do it.
2) FOCUS ON WHAT'S WORKING;
We  always tend to get more of what we focus on in life. It's true. This means it's vitally important to be mindful of where our attention is. If we have a habitual pattern of looking at what's not working, according to this tenet, we'll be getting more of that-more of what's not working.
Please remember that energy flows where your attention goes. So focus on what you love, what makes you smile, and what makes you feel healthy, and alive! In doing so, you'll soon have even more to be happy about.
3) THE POWER OF WORDS
The words we say to others and ourselves directly influence our mindset, health and actions for better or worse every single day. Positive language has been demonstrated to improve scores on aptitude tests, boost physical performance, and even strengthen the immune system. And negative talk can do just the opposite.
To harness the positive power of words and put them to work in your own life, you simply start by being more mindful about what you're saying, how you're saying it, and what effect it's having on others as well as yourself. Then speak often of inspiration, love, gratitude, health and healing, and how you're transforming, improving, and making good progress. The more you do , the more you will.
4) ENVISIONING SUCCESS
Another effective way to shift your mindset is to envision a successful outcome. Many people who do well  with their personal transformation make a daily practice to see, in their mind, where they're going before they get there. They envision, with crystal clarity, what their renewed body and improved life will be like. For many this becomes a very powerful practice.
Please consider making a few minutes of quiet time each day to sit in stillness and hold an image in mind of how you want to be, how you want to look, how you want to feel. When you do, you may very wheel be surprised with how rapidly that inner vision becomes your external reality.

Action step:

1. Empowering words and phrases that I will utilize in my daily communication with others and myself include:

2. A description of the future self I envision is:

3. Three empowering, healthy thoughts which are aligned with my transformation objectives are:

Chapter 9: Accepting Responsibility

Note: All quotes used from this post (and my previous posts) are from Bill Phillips Transformation book.

I will be honest..... I've made excuses as to why I'm not losing weight, or why I'm not motivated, or why I'm constantly eating junk food and gaining back the 10 pounds I lost 3 months ago. When I read this chapter it hurt to realize that I am the only reason I'm not moving forward. Fortunately I also felt rejuvenated and inspired. Because I know that I can take that control back in my life. I can take responsibility and move forward. Today is a new day and I will focus on where I'm going. Focusing on the past can hurt and sometimes bring out the worst in us. This morning I woke up feeling lousy and sad. I know it's because I went overboard in my eating of junk food the past 2 days. I started to think of how I totally blew it and what was the point of trying today. It's so hard.  It's going to take a lot of effort to get back to where I was. But I stopped myself because I could see a spiraling downward mindset. That kind of mindset can bring about feelings of despair, worthlessness, sadness, and can lead to depression, anxiety, and behaviors that are degrading and unhealthy.
Today you can take responsibility of your health.

Bill Phillips says it right when he said, "Most every great transformation I've witnessed over the years was preceded by a dramatic increase of self-responsibility. The moment you truly decide to accept ownership of your health, happiness and life is the moment when everything begins to change. When you stop blaming others, give up the victim stories, and you accept responsibility, it's then and only then that you can harness your true power and ability to take control and make remarkable changes for the better."

"Unfortunately, in our society today, we're conditioned to do pretty much just the opposite. Not happy? It's because of the people in my life. They're the ones making me miserable. Not healthy? It's the genetics I inherited. Darn ancestors! Crummy job? It's because of the government and how they screwed up the economy. Haven't been able to consistently eat right and exercise? That's because all the so-called experts make it so darn complicated and difficult for me; besides, I don't have time because everyone else expects me to take care of them first."
"One of the telltale signs that we've given our power away (either knowingly or unknowingly) is by the excuses we make. By their nature, excuses deny our responsibility. Those who've taken control of the things they can in their life choose to share the reasons why things are the way they are, even when those reasons might not always make them look good."

"When we make a resolute decision to accept responsibility for our own health and happiness we are, in effect, becoming a 'no-excuses person.' This is not an action, it's a mental shift. In this stage, we're conditioning our minds, or rather un-conditioning them, to reflect the reality that we're in charge of our own well-being. In this stage, you might wake up and you really don't feel like doing your workout. Rather than making an excuse that you don't have time today, we learn to see in that moment we simply don't want to do it. That's fine. The fact is, I rarely feel like exercising when I get up in the morning but rather than making an excuse, I say, "I'm choosing to take control of my health today and so I'm going to exercise even though right now, I don't really want to."

"Knowing what we have control over and accepting responsibility for it is remarkably empowering. When you reach that point, you really can become the pilot of your life and make it better and brighter than it's ever been. When you do, you'll have more life energy and strength to unselfishly give to others."
ACTION STEP:
 Three specific excuses that I've used multiple times to avoid taking responsibility for my own condition are:

Three things I'm talking control of, starting today, are:

Three actions I'll take this week to demonstrate that I'm accepting responsibility for the things I've written about are:

Three things I realize are beyond my control which I surrender are:

Week 8: The Big Forgive

I wish I could share the whole chapter with you but I'll share some excerpts.  Even just holding the intention of forgiving someone has been shown to have great benefits.
"Those who forgive are those who choose to forgive. There's nothing random or unintentional about it. ...Forgiveness is not done out of weakness; it is an act of strength and courage."
"The price of unforgiveness is high and can include depression, a hot temper, anxiety, emotional pain that takes hold in the physical form (headaches, backaches, fatigue) and toxic amounts of stress. The benefits of forgiveness are many and include improved heart health, brighter energy, emotional well-being, decreased risk for disease and expanding spiritual awareness.."
"Another unfortunate thing about deeply held and suppressed anger towards someone is that it spills over and interferes with our relationships with everyone else. It can make us feel like we're always victims, and there is injustice in even the most insignificant daily incidents. ...The more we dwell on hurtful events, grudges and vengeance, the more anger will take root in our minds and hearts. Before long, negative feelings can crowd out positive ones. Until the anger and bitterness are released, they will continue to leak poison into virtually all areas of your life, and can even destroy families, careers and friendships."
"Forgiveness is something that happens inside of you. It doesn't mean you're saying what happened to cause a resentment wasn't wrong or that it didn't matter. What it means is that you're saying, "I choose to let go of this negative feeling towards the person whom I perceive has hurt me." After neutralizing the emotional charge behind the grievance by letting it go, you may very well file it away in your low-priority memory storage. It's not necessary to work on forgetting it altogether."

1. After some introspection, these are three incidences and people which I've identified I hold some resentment towards:

2. How I rate the emotional impact, on a scale of 1-10, of each of the grievances listed above is:

3. Three feelings I would enjoy if I were able to completely eliminate this resentment from my mind and heart are:

4. Three ways my health and life would improve as a result of completely forgiving the offender and letting go of this resentment are:

5. My Big Hurt story which expresses how I perceive the hurtful incident goes like this:
(In your own words, write out what you are feeling. It can be two paragraphs or several pages; it's up to you. )

6. A nonjudgmental, unconditionally supportive person I can talk through my Big Hurt story with is:
NOTE: After you complete one act of forgiveness from start to finish, please consider setting yourself free from the other two resentments on your list.

Week7: Progress Not Perfection

This is Collette here! Carrie asked me to post for the next few weeks. This is a great week for me to post. I need this as I'm sure many of you do. Bill Phillips talks about a girl who lost 15 lbs but would look in the mirror and just see failure. Because she had an ideal of perfection, like a swimsuit model on the cover of a magazine. It became her exclusive focus and each day she'd get up, look in the mirror and see that she wasn't there yet. She didn't even see the amazing progress she was making. She convinced herself that she was a failure and then she quit. "What happened is she got caught in 'The Void.' The Void is a dangerous place we can wander into if we measure our progression based on what hasn't happened rather than what has. The Void can zap your self-confidence and send your self-esteem tumbling, making it impossible for you to feel good about yourself. Hanging out there can also lead to full-time frustration, which can permeate every aspect of your life."
So how do we change that and avoid The Void? WE focus on PROGRESS instead of perfection. To do that we must start focusing on what we have achieved and accomplished instead of those things we haven't.
Progress is a step in the right direction: it's any action you can take which moves you further away from your point A (where you were at the beginning of this process) and closer to your point B (where you decided to go).
So go back to your goals from the beginning and make sure they are specific, clear, measurable, AND REALISTIC. If not, then go back and please revise your goals if necessary. Making sure they are not ideals (looking like a swimsuit model) will ensure that you can feel good about your progress and take you away from the mindset of perfection.

As I thought about this week's goals I also thought about how it applies to us in other aspects of our lives. As a Latter-Day Saint I could focus on how I don't read my scriptures every day like I'd like to and I could feel like a failure. Instead I can focus on my progress: I say my morning prayers when I roll out of bed, or how I read scriptures with my kids most days of the week.

As part of this Transformation group I could focus on what a failure and bad example I've been. Or I can focus on the progress I've made. Last week I didn't write down the healthy spaces makeover but I did clean out my son's room 2 weeks prior because I had read that chapter and felt like his room needed help. I donated a couple of bags to Goodwill and threw away a bag of misc. toys. And today I threw away a couple of lonely socks because I was thinking of last week's assignment. There is PROGRESS!!!! Certainly far from perfection.

As a mother and housekeeper I can choose to focus on how I failed to give my bathroom a good scrubbing. Or I can focus on how I mopped my floors today and helped my kids clean up the basement. I can choose to focus on what a rotten mom I was when I exploded at my children today; wondering where that demon came from or I can focus on how I brought my kids (and nephew with autism) to the library today and patiently waited and helped them complete 3 crafts.

Which way will make YOU happier? Always focusing on progress rather than perfection. But it is a choice, and it's a choice that we have to make EVERY SINGLE DAY when we wake up in the morning and when we go to bed at night. So I choose happiness and progress.
Here is this week's assignment:
Action step:
Five things I can do between now and the end of the day tomorrow that move me in the direction of my goals and intentions are:
Example:
1. Exercise intensely for 40 minutes.
2. Eat six nutritious meals that are nutrient rich and calorie sparse.
3. Encourage someone else who's also making healthy changes.
4. Check in with my community support group.
5. Restock my kitchen with a dozen healthy fruits and vegetables.

Then and Now

(Note: written last Saturday & finally putting the final touches on it today)

I haven't posted in awhile. Been crazy busy. The good kind of busy. I am Happy. I am glad to be moving forward. I am grateful that I am healthy. I, more than anything right now in this moment, am grateful that my dad listened to his doctor, got surgery, battled cancer, fought hard, and faithfully and without complaint completed his chemo treatments. We celebrated these great moments today by running the Whiskey Row. My parents and kids did the 2 mile fun run and I did the 10k.

 

The day I found out my dad had cancer was also the day I started Body for Life (my very first time to do the 12 week program). The night before the start of the challenge I was skimming through chapters I had already read. One of the chapters hit me really hard that night. Bill Phillips talked about how there would be trials and hard things that would come into our lives. And that when, NOT IF, but when the trials come it all depended on how we decided to handle the trial. The book talked about making the choice to continue forth in making healthy choices and being fit even if life got hard. After reading this I thought to myself, "What hard thing is going to come into my life?" And then I brushed it aside; I sure didn't need to give myself anxiety thinking that maybe some hard thing was coming down the road; there was surely nothing I could do but worry. So I stopped and thought, "Life will bring hard things, I've seen it in the past, and I know it will come. But I will decide now to go forth with the challenge even WHEN hard things come my way." The very next day I started my BFL eating, journaling, and fitness routine. Right after finishing my 45 minute arm workout with my sister-in-law Joy I got a phone call from my mom. I was sitting on the couch relaxing and recovering after a hard and awkward first work out. I received devastating news about my dad; cancer was discovered during a routine colonoscopy. I couldn't believe it. I broke down in tears. My dad was going to have emergency surgery the very next day and I HAD to be there, I desperately wanted to be there for him and my mom. Cancer has taken several loved ones from my family and so fear, heartache and the unknown set in. When the kids came home from school I told them about grandpa and his cancer. We sat on the couch and we cried and we held each other and I told them everything was alright. My nine year old said' "It's not fair!"  and sobbed into my chest. And I cried and agreed with her. Mike was so supportive and got the next day off work to drive me there. Family stepped in to take care of the little ones. We visited my dad at the hospital for the 3 days he was there. I carried protein bars and shakes with me. I ate salad at the cafeteria. I felt like the only thing I had control of was my diet. My fitness routine included walking Claire around the hospital floors and walking to and from Wendy's across the street. Thankfully the cancer was removed. Dad had to start chemo 4 weeks later. He did chemo for 6 months and experienced nasty side effects:bleeding gums, nauseau, vomiting, extra cold sensation, metallic taste, etc. But all the while he worked full time, shoveled snow from the driveway for my mom and went on with life. We know many people prayed and fasted for him and for us. We are so grateful for others' love, faith, and prayers in our behalf. My dad completed his chemo just a few short weeks ago and to celebrate we did the Whiskey Row run together. We did it in honor of my dad and his battle with cancer.

 

I am happy for my dad. I continue to pray that his cancer will not come back. I thank Heavenly Father for answered prayers and blessings. I am proud of him for taking care of himself, eating right, and exercising.

 

It was a HARD thing for me to find out my dad had cancer. It was devastating and depressing. I was hopeful but I have seen too many lives taken. But I continued forth with my goals and eating right and exercising. I had made the choice before the trial came that I would carry forth no matter what hard thing came.

The night before I found out my dad had cancer these are words I read from Bill Phillips, "We must all accept that ill fortune is an inevitable part of life, and it is because of, not in spite of, misfortune that we grow. You see, our character will never be fully tested until things are not going our way. Those who have the courage to succced in spite of adversity become an inspiration. They contribute value to the lives of others. They make a difference...whenever you encounter adversity-whenever something comes up that you believe might prevent you from finishing your Program and successfully transforming your body and life-immediately ask yourself, 'What can  I do to turn this negative into a positive? How can I make this work for me rather than against me?'"

 

I hope that each of you that are doing the Transformation with us can take this little nugget of inspiration and know that when hard things come your way you will have already decided that you will carry forth and make it work for you instead of against you. You will find inner strength that you didn't know you had. You will do great things! I am grateful that this challenge came into my life during what could've been a very depressing and hard time in my life. I was able to focus on my health-physical and mental-and focus on the postive in life. When we make goals and try our best to follow them-even the smallest and most simple of goals-we will see our lives slowly transform. We are routing for you!!!!!

 

 

 

 

This is a picture of me on my 2nd day of Body for Life.

This is a picture of me today at our race that we did in honor of my dad. I am continuing to set goals and trying to take care of my body. I've kept off the 25 pounds I lost since the day I found out my dad had cancer.

  



Why do I do this?

Carrie told me I should post about the reasons I am trying to lose weight, exercise and be my best self. I have thought about this several times in the last few months and years....but especially since I started this challenge. I know that one of the first things that comes to my mind is that I am doing this for my kids. My kids have overweight genetics on both sides of the family. Not only that but both grandpas have diabetes. We have high cholesterol, high blood pressure, and cancer, and who knows what else. The odds are not in our favor. So I want to give my kids the best chance possible of living a healthy, long, and fun life. I actually think that exercise is fun. There are many people who may look at me like I am crazy but I truly enjoy it. Not always, but most of the time. I love to pick up my kids from school on Wednesdays and take them to a nearby mountain to  hike up. I love looking over the scenic mountain top and enjoying the crisp air and knowing that we did something hard TOGETHER.  I love telling them how much I love living in this area where we can drive 2 miles down the road and go on an amazing hike. I love that we are doing the Whiskey Row race together. I love that they are willing to pay for a third of the price because they so badly want to walk/run with grandpa and grandma. I love that Mike bought me a bike a couple of years ago. I am going to start taking the girls on bike roads around the lake just across the street from my house. Clearly exercise is usually not the problem for me. I've enjoyed it for as long as I can remember. I have the energy, the desire and the commitment. I guess the hard part is the eating part. I have become a stress eater, a bored eater, a social eater. A downright emotional eater. I don't want my kids to see that or think that's how they should deal with their emotions. I don't want them to think it's okay to down a bag of potato chips or carton of ice cream or bag of cookies (I've never actually done that but I felt like I wanted to and would've easily forged ahead). I want my kids to feel the stress, acknowledge it, and then turn to healthy outlets of dealing with it. I'm still trying to figure out healthy outlets. Exercise is one of them. I think that is why I enjoy it so much. It releases the feel good hormones and just makes me feel downright good because I accomplished something hard. I love my kids so much and I want to be a good example to them. My 2nd reason for doing this is because when I am turning my bad habits around and making goals and commitments and doing hard things it just makes me feel good and downright happy. And who doesn't want those things in their life? When I start to slide on the eating and exercise I feel like other things in my life start to slide:my house cleaning, my relationships, how I treat my kids/husband. But especially the way that I feel about myself. I'm not a person that is depressed or sad. I am generally happy and try to enjoy life. But there was a time in my life where depression took over. I couldn't eat,drink, sleep, pray, drive, go to school, without feeling a deep and dark weight surrounding me. It overtook me like nothing else I've ever felt. Intense feelings, thoughts and doubts took over my life. I don't normally share these feelings. But I think it's important to realize that one of the reasons I am doing this is because I am emotionally strong and capable of handling hard things that come my way when I am physically strong. I could get all spiritual right now but I'm not. I just know that for me I will always be striving to eat nutritiously and exercise. My physical health is as important as my mental and emotional health. Those are my top reasons I may seem overly obsessed about being healthy and fit.

Food log for Wed.

I felt hungry today. I don't know if that meant my metabolism is working harder or what. I went a little over my calories again. I don't want to eat trail mix anymore. The calories add up too fast and it isn't very filling. The kids and I hiked up Thumb Butte (with Claire in a hiking pack). It took 40 minutes up and 25 minutes down. It was a great workout and I enjoyed my protein bar at the top as we overlooked the beautiful scenery.
1. Protein shake (with pb/frozen bananas/flax seed)
trail mix
250 Calories
2. Oatmeal
Egg beaters
trail mix
290 Calories
3. Turkey sandwich (no cheese, no mayo)
Clementine and salad, sugar free dressing
5 wheat thins
240 Calories
4. 3 nibbles of low fat cookie (Ha,ha. I took a little nibble out of each of my kids' cookie)
2 whooper eggs (hey no judging , I needed some quick energy for my intense hike)
Protein bar
clementine
265 calories
5. Chicken/apple/craisen/sunflower seed salad
sugar free dressing
a small helping of Quinoa/pork
230 calories
6. 1 cup Sugar free jello
10 calories
About 1285 Calories